Guest Blogger: Picture Perfect with SS Amber B

I have a confession:  I’ve been stalking you… on Facebook, that is.  And don’t judge, ‘cause I know you’ve done it too!  We all have, especially within this group of fantastic ladies who have opened their hearts so many times to strangers who quickly become friends.    Browsing a Facebook page is an easy way to get to know the acquaintances in your Friends list and to see what’s going on in their lives, or catch up with old friends whom you haven’t talked to in awhile. 

 

But warning:   This is a dangerous pastime, one that could lead you down a road of self doubt and insecurity, if you take everything at face value…

 

How many times have you scrolled through your newfeed and felt jealous?  Inadequate?  Failing at the game of Life?  I know I have many times.  Some days it seems like everyone I know runs marathons, makes butternut squash soup from scratch, throws handmade birthday parties for their kids that rival those of Martha Stewart, and somehow still manage to look amazing for all the sexy-time they have with their partners.

   

I read these updates and then sadly look around at my own life- here I sit at my computer, with kids who needed baths two days ago, a moody man, and I don’t even have the energy to put away the two weeks of laundry surrounding me like a mountain, let alone start training for an Ironman.  I think to myself, “What the frack am I doing wrong? How do they do it all so easily?”

The answer is- they don’t.  No one can do it ALL.  What we see when we read a person’s blog, profile, or post is a carefully crafted image designed to share the best of a life.  We see what they WANT us to see, and there is always more to a person’s story than what meets the eye.  Maybe just beyond the frame of that perfect profile picture is another Laundry Mountain, equally as daunting to that person, which we don’t see.

When we start looking at everyone else’s successes we sometimes forget to celebrate our own.  Instead of comparing your life unfairly to what you think everyone else is experiencing, find the joy in your own story and focus on the best of what YOU have to share- and remember to share it with yourself!  Real life is messy and that’s okay.  Just remember everyone has messes, they just don’t always pop up on a news feed.  

-Amber B

Motivational Monday: Fight The System

As we grow up and life smacks us in the face, we are forced to take on responsibilities and mature.  That can mean a variety of things, but typically it includes paying our bills, following a schedule/routine, and making difficult decisions.  Youthfulness is often sacrificed for what is right and what is necessary, but that can sometimes leave us feeling that our sparkle has been dulled.  I currently work a full time, 9-5 job, as well as have two children, a home and a husband.  I am extremely grateful for that schedule, and each and every one of my other adult blessings.  On the other hand, I often feel the need to defy these systematic guidelines that have been put into place.  I often miss my ability to be spontaneous, and disregard the consequences of my actions.  While I am grateful I have the ability to assess the repercussions of my choices, I often yearn for the youthfulness that was seemingly invincible.  

On this Motivational Monday, I want to remember that within us all is a youthful flame that continues to burn.  It warms our soul, and is just beneath the surface.  It may be hushed at times, but it is not gone.  Each and everyday provides the opportunity to do something a little bit crazy and a little bit unexpected.  Within daily routines and responsibilities there are moments presented to fight the system and spread your wings.  Capture these moments, embrace them, for they are what will kindle that tiny flame within your soul. 

  Share these moments with those closest with you!  Whether it be your kiddos, who could use the lesson that age is just a number, your spouse or your best friends.  Spread the moments of spontaneity and disregard for consequence (although, by consequence I mean getting a splinter while frolicking barefoot, not stealing a car!).  Let us know about a moment you fought the system, and spread  your wings!  Do you make an effort to find these moments?  Share Share Share!!  

Shady McShaderson

The sun has recently graced us with its presence and oh how it feels good!! It seeps into the soul and ignites bliss with its warm rays.  I have been wearing sunglasses since I was in junior high, so in addition to pure joy, the sun also presents a fabulous opportunity to spice up your face.  A great pair of shades is an awesome accessory, with endless opportunities.  I am prone to breaking and/or losing just about anything, so for me it is more practical to get a less costly pair.  I opt for several pairs of cheap but versatile shades.  

On this For Yourself Friday buy yourself some new shades!! I challenge you to get a pair that is new to you, and a bit out of your comfort zone.  Get a different color or shape.  Think about the look you are hoping to achieve and take the plunge.  If you are feeling retro, a good cat eye is awesome.  Aviators are great for a day on the lake and big Breakfast at Tiffany shades are fabulous for a day at the wineries! 

Today I stumbled across an old pair I haven't worn I years.  If you have an old pair collecting dust (and they are cute!) revive them!! Here's my current eye gear 

Let us know if you buy a new pair!! Post a pic and let us know how they work out!!!

        

Guest Blogger: Sisterly Love with SS Ash

We talk about the world, and its riches and spoils. But what are we doing for the world? What are we doing for our brothers and sisters? 

Something Secret Sisters has taught me is, I am not alone. This past winter, my sisters saved me. They probably have no idea that they did, but I was at my wit’s end. My life felt like it was unraveled. Not sure if any of my answers to the QOTD (question of the day) gave me away or not. I felt so bad for the SS that had me (Sorry April!!). I had thought about ending my life, more than once. I’m not ashamed to admit that. My rope was getting tight and I had nowhere to run, except to my sisters. The joking, the online hugs, the laughter they gave me, were the things that helped me through.

Why am I sharing this now? I may not have been here if it was not for this group of amazing, thoughtful, hilarious women. We are all from different walks of life, with different stories, but we are all the same. We are sisters. We are here to encourage and lift each other up. I encourage you to reach out and hug a near by sister. Lift her up, Help her out, Let her know that she is not alone. She is loved.

Motivational Monday- State of Mind

I recently returned from a much needed vacay in my home state of California.  It was a rejuvenation I didn't fully comprehend I needed, and the initial come down was brutal.  After a major meltdown, I began to reflect on what had been provided from the amazing escape.  I realized that the feelings I experienced while there could continue throughout my days, regardless of where I was.  The serenity, inspiration, and bliss were all things I could create within my own life in Southern Illinois.  We returned late on Friday night, my meltdown occurred on Saturday afternoon, and the nurturing and preservation of my Cali state of mind began on Sunday.

Our environment has such a powerful impact on our state of mind, but we are also fully capable of altering our environment.  We can surround ourselves with an abundance of things to help guide our thoughts and our feelings.  For me that currently includes reggae music and planting a garden.

On this Motivational Monday do something to help create your own state of mind.  Alter your environment to fit the mood you want to experience.  Buy fresh flowers, paint a picture, crank up the music, make fresh lemonade.  Do something, ANYTHING, to nurture and cultivate the state of mind you want to experience!!

Fill us in on how you dictate your surroundings, and positively alter your environment!  What works best for you?  Share, share, share!!
-Lindsay

Motivational Monday - Guest Blogger Amber P.

Good Monday morning lovely sisters! While Lindsay is away on a MUCH deserved vacation/family visit, she has asked me to guest post on today’s Motivational Monday. There are few things in life I love more than a good, optimistic, smack you in the forehead quote to start a week. A gentle reminder that each new week is a new opportunity to do that one (or several) things you have in your mind to take on. Whether big or little, those opportunities are some of the most beautiful things about being present in your own life. 

After college I worked in a law firm that liked to sell themselves as progressive (as progressive as Insurance litigators can get, I suppose!). Each Monday morning we would gather in the conference room and have our weekly pow wow. One of the partners would start the meeting with a quote that spoke to them and they would then spend the next thirty minutes showing all of the firm how it applies. I remember one of these quotes in particular, it is the quote I hold on to and led to be eventually quit that job and seek out my passion.

How true is that? How many times do we accept things as they are because well, we are on the right track? We are paying the bills, we are picking the kids up from school, we eat dinner as a family. All great, important stuff! But what about that other little something your heart desires? What about those little goals we all have that if we reached would basically make our heads explode from the sheer joy of it all? Shouldn’t we be working on that too? So, on today’s Motivational Monday, I want you all to do one little thing to move your goal down the track. Is it something “small” like incorporating vegetables into your daily meals or something “huge” like creating that business plan? Whatever it is, do it! We only have one lifetime, shouldn’t we be doing everything we can to make it the best one ever? Be present, take charge, and don’t let the train of life run you over while you overthink your dreams! Those dreams were given to you for a reason! Chase them!

For Yourself Friday: Mad Dash Makeup

I am a full coverage kind of gal myself.  It is my security blanket, and without makeup I feel pretty naked.  With that being said, there are definitely days where full makeup is just not in the cards.  Sometimes I am in a mad dash to get out the door, which is where the three minute face comes into play.  This simple and quick face refresher takes under three minutes and uses four products that every girly should have in their bag of tricks!  Here is my naked face.

The first order of business is concealer.  This helps to cover any dark circles or bags you may have, as well as cover wrinkles.  In addition, it brightens which makes you look refreshed!  I use Maybelline, Fit Me Concealer.  It can be purchased at almost any drug store and is under $10.  It can be used with or without foundation, and is long lasting.  

  Apply under the eye, on the brow bone and between the brows to highlight.      

Take a selfie, or in my case a war paint mug shot :-)

Then apply a bronzer of your choice.  I use Rimmel, Natural Bronzer.  It has a very subtle shimmer, so you look vibrant but not shiny or glittery.  It can also be purchased at most drug stores, and costs around $6.

I then apply mascara.  Everyone loves a good lash, but falsies are not doable as you are dashing out the door.  Grab your fave mascara, apply several coats and watch your eyes pop!  My current mascara choice is Maybelline, The Colossal.  It doesn't clump, and makes your lashes look nice and long.  It runs for around $8.

The final touch is a your favorite lip gloss. It rounds out and completes this simple and quick look!  

From start to finish this takes me under three minutes.  I even timed it to make sure!!

The specific products you use are entirely personal preference as well.  I have used a variety of products, ranging from under $10, up to over $75.  At this point in my life I cannot justify spending $35 on concealer, but I try to find the best drug store dupes!  

On this For Yourself Friday, try out the mad dash makeup.  Let us know how it goes!  

Do you have a mad dash makeup routine?  What does it entail?  Try out the under three minute refresher and let us know how it goes.  Post a pic!  Share the products you use!